... And I take on city life as a dog owner.

When Larry and I agreed to watching Benny while my parents go on vacation, I pictured days filled with calm and fuzzy company while I write. I pictured welcome walking breaks.

About five hours in, I realize that this little guy may be much better off in the 'burbs.

During our first city stroll together, I learned that Benny is the only pup in Manhattan who can't seem to walk in a straight line. Nope- every step is another sharp zig or zag that makes us dodge flurries of angry not-dog-people on their Friday commute.

Also, it's nice that Benny feels the need to sniff every single piece of garbage on the street, every greying snow bank, and every homeless person. Like I have all the time in the world...

Turns out this little shih tzu is NOT the midday shopping partner I hoped for either. Bringing him to Second Time Around's 70% off sale: bad idea. Even with the leash pulled taut, Benny found a way to loop his way into other shoppers' paths. Some liked it. Some (understandably so) had zero interest in an animal coming between them and their $38 vintage Valentino heels. Not so long ago, that would've been me... It goes without saying that I could not try on a thing.

Benny: for us to make this work, you need to find some serious NYC sophistication. That means:
1. No trying to sneak in past doormen to buildings that are not your own.
2. Avoiding ALL slushy corners.
3. Walking close to me and in a straight line when I take you out.
4. Sitting still and patient in stores– ESPECIALLY when there is a sale.

Can you handle it?